Time

     I have spent a lot of time over the last year thinking about, well...TIME.  I think that we can all agree that there just never seems to be enough of it! (At least not enough to do the things that we really want to do.) In the 1970 movie Scrooge , my favorite movie version of Charles Dickens' A Chistmas Carol  ,  the Ghost of Christmas Present says, " There is never enough time to do or say all the things that we would wish. The thing is to try to do as much as you can in the time that you have. Remember Scrooge, time is short, and suddenly, you're not here any more." Such profound and wise words.
     I spent most of 2013 feeling sad, tired and angry. I think most people who know me will agree that when they think of me, sad,tired and angry are not normally the three words that first come to mind. I just felt such sadness that I was letting TIME slip away, working a job that was leaving me increasingly emotionally unfulfilled and physically exhausted, and I was so angry with myself for letting myself get to "that place." For a long while, I felt a real and nagging sense of hopelessness.  The  TIMEs I felt the most happy, and most myself really, were the TIMEs I spent with my family and friends and the TIMEs I spent creating something...anything.
     Then, at the end of July, something terrible and wonderful happened. My supervisors approached me and told me I would have to increase my work schedule. More weekends, more nights, more TIME away from home...UNACCEPTABLE was my first thought. Hadn't anyone been listening to me?! I had said, over and over again, that I was unhappy. Did anyone really care?  This is where the wonderful happened. It finally dawned on me. Why not just walk away? I do need to work.  The bills do need to get paid, but I didn't need to work MORE. Why not ask to have more TIME at home and with my family? I announced my intention to semi-retire beginning January 1, 2014. I made it clear that I needed to be employed, but just not as a full-time employee. Thankfully, my supervisors agreed with my plan. What a relief! I was prepared to seek employment elsewhere, if I had to, but my management has really made an effort to help me move forward on the next part of my life journey.
     So, NOW IS THE TIME!  What am I going to do with all this extra TIME? The list is long. I have already enjoyed an extended Christmas holiday with the family, immediate and extended. I have helped two of the three daughters with a much needed, mom assisted, room cleaning/purge...how does so much crap end up under those beds? I attended the first indoor soccer game of the indoor season. I have prepared a few lunches and dinners...I did miss that!  I have also done a great deal of planning.  I really want to use the TIME that I have made available in the most efficient and enjoyable way. (Anyone with a Type A personality will understand the need to plan, and God knows...I AM a Type A gal!)  Lists  have been made. Goals have been set. Calendars are at the ready.  The TIME for excuses about TIME is over.
     I do realize, I assure you, that there will never be enough TIME.  However, I am elated to have made a confident and purposeful decision about how I am going to utilize and savor the TIME that I have  available to me.  I really want to concentrate on family and creativity in 2014. I will take the TIME to do just that!  It's a work in progress.